It's fiction, but in 58 words

An exercise in brevity.

Unprepared

She studies the rust spots on the ancient clawfoot tub, tears in her eyes.
Above the lavender-scented bubbles, juts the rise of her belly; an island of olive-colored skin. She wipes a wet cloth over the rise, watches the track of baby oil beads.
She’s 16, on the cusp of adulthood.
Nowhere ready.
“Baby,” she whispers.

5 comments:

Sepiru Chris said...

Criminy.

First its a drabble, now a drab.

If anything with more poignancy.

Have I mentioned haiku before...

Congratulations.

Noah the Great said...

Ooh. This is intense.

The fiction in 58 mambo is rather fun. :D

Noah the Great said...

Ooh. This is intense.

The fiction in 58 mambo is rather fun. :D

missalister said...

So full of everything that ever was sweet and sad, this one moment, captured by these very few words. Very nice : )

Megha said...

You have very beautifully captured feelings in short and concise story, great work.