A taste for meat, with cheese (and egg)

All hail the meaty goodness of a little downtown place in The Queen City called Hamburger Inn.
It's near the muni bus depot, on an alley and is long and lean. One slender, white-Formica-topped counter with a dozen chrome swivel stools; two refrigerators (can pop only); a two-basket fryer; and a well-seasoned flat grill that's like three feet wide.
The owner/cook has faded tats up and down his arms. When he turns, his hips nearly bump the counter, the grill. He drops some cheese. He yells "FUCK!"
And turns to the counter with a pen and an order pad. Nobody raises an eyebrow.
"What'llya have?"
I went double cheeseburger, with a friend egg on top, fries, Coke.
"Gimme the bacon cheeseburger, with egg, and what are SW Taters, are they like tater tots?" a compatriot says.
"Yeah, like tater tots, but they've got little flecks of jalapeno and cheese in 'em."
"Oh, I'll have an order of those."
He takes balls of ground beef - the size of billiard balls - out of a Ziploc bag, five in all to feed the three of us, and tosses them on the grill. The sizzle is immediate.
"One thing about coming here, everyone knows it," my buddy says. " 'Go to Hamburger Inn for lunch?' Yeah. The smell stays with you."
The owner flattens the patties on the grill, sending steam and fat sizzling. The patties cook slow. Eggs get cracked. Fries and tots go into the oil.
The burger is served on a single white bleached paper plate, the kind that are sold in a package of 100 for $1.29. A side of pickle chips (you can get your pickles fried, too). Ketchup and mustard in plastic, color-specific squeeze bottles.
You have to ask for tomato and lettuce.
I decline the salad. I just want meat, cheese, chicken embryo.
My double cheese with egg is a good 5 inches tall.
It is juicy.
It is wonderful.
And I find myself fortified for the rest of the day.

4 comments:

Ambercita said...

oh.my.goodness.
this actually sounds really good...and no, i'm not preggers.
way to go on skipping that salad, however.
-a

chrisn said...

Here in the Heartland (south central Kansas, as it's known here'bouts)I was introduced to my very first hamburger deluxe pizza.
It satisfies the craving for pizza and a hamburger all at once! It even includes crunchy dill pickles on top... and definitely no salad!

ThomG said...

ahh, the hamburger pizza. Couple of weeks ago, I had a cheeseburger pizza. it was surprisingly good.

Anonymous said...

Every one Knows ABOUT FAT elephant sized Americans ....
....they look like burger .....
MacDonald and Burger king should take the responsibility .... along with local Hamburger Inn's ....
actually Heathcare companies should sue ..... them