Mmmmmm, beer

When you’re in college, you drink the cheapest beer you can muster.
Carling Black Label (when I was at the University of Nebraska in the 80s, you could get a cold six-pack for $1.69). Shaffer. Blatz. Hamms. Keystone (and Keystone Light, shudder).
Milwaukee’s Best.
Some people never lose the taste for bad beer. That’s OK. Somebody’s gotta keep Bud and Miller in bidness.
But Milwaukee’s Best?
Man, I hated that beer. Still do.
But the Web site is funny.
Since it goes down to the most-common denominator for appeal for its target audience – downloadable posters of scantily-clad women, and videos of a few yahoos who built a cannon that shoots, what else, cans of Milwaukee’s Best.
You can witness the carnage at www.milbestlight.com/cannon.aspx.
Actually, if you think about it, a beer cannon is the perfect use for Milwaukee’s Best (Miller refers to it by it’s nickname, “The Beast;” we all know it as “Swillwaukee’s Piss”). Less bad beer that has to be drunk, more beer that needs to be spilled.
I was out of college, working for the Memphis Commercial Appeal, when I first realized that you could “launch” beer like a rocket. We were at a retreat for all the bureau reporters (I was in the far-flung outpost in Jonesboro, Ark.), tending to a campfire when I hit upon this phenomenon.
Put a full, shaken-up beer can - with the pop tab slightly pressed – in a fire upside-down and the heat will build to the point of a liquid-fuel rocket.
We were launching beers 40 feet in the air for hours. Beer that our metro editor had purchased for us.
That beer?
Milwaukee’s Best.

1 comments:

TheRobRogers said...

I covered a lumberjack festival last year in McCloud. Aside from all the other lumberjack activities and games featured at the event, the most interesting was the ax-throw. That consisted of throwing an ax at a can of beer on a tree-stump(?!). I obviously don't have to tell you the brand of beer. (That's right, Mil's Best.)

And that reminds me, we still ahve to launch our Mentos-Diet Coke rockets.