Wednesday's Three Word Wednesday

The words over at Three Word Wednesday at modify, obedient and veil. There are no bad dogs or bad children, just bad owners – and parents.

Behavior Modification
I’m a horrible child, if you want to know the whole truth of it.
My parents had no choice to ship me off to obedience training, not after the last time I set the sofa on fire. And I don’t blame them in the least.
(Matches, man, show me one of those folded packs of cardboard, with those happy little heads made out of sulfur and potassium chlorate and I lose it.)
Six weeks with a trainer/handler and I’m a different person, a Responsible Young Man. Of course, she modified my behavior with a steady diet of electro-shock therapy and a chloroform-soaked newspaper rolled tight into a baton, but whatever works, right?
I no longer wet the bed, chew up mom’s expensive pumps or charge the neighbor when playing in the front yard. Still having a little bit of trouble with the whole garbage can thing, but the vitamins are helping, I think.
I’m even allowed out in the evenings, free to roam the house sometimes without that stupid electric collar that sends a few volts through the system anytime I start screaming at the mailman or head toward the junk drawer where dad keeps that luscious box of kitchen safety matches.
How do I do it, you ask? How do I not turn on them?
Well, they do feed me and clothe me and hang a roof over my head. And don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful and all.
But this obedience thing is really just an act. A veil I wear across my face, making it a blank canvas of submission.
Biding my time. Biting my lip, until it bleeds if I have to, waiting, watching.
For the right time to torch this everlasting motherfucker, and everything in it.

23 comments:

anthonynorth said...

That's quite a dog's life. Excellently done as always.

Julie Jordan Scott said...

I'm rooting for the dog, as are my precious pooches, Hank and Rainer.

I'll be this dog's look out anyday...

Who do those humans think they are?

ThomG said...

is this too esoteric to thus be confusing? It is about a boy, not a dog.

Andy Sewina said...

I'm biting my tongue, I know a little boy who likes playing with matches!

Lilibeth said...

I do feel sorry for the little rascal, but at the same time, glad he wasn't mine...and I disagree somewhat with your byline. I feel that some children are terrors despite their parents not because of them.

Jason said...

No... I got it. Good stuff Thom.

Stan Ski said...

Kids - what are they like...?

Just someone said...

Wow!

Probably true that no bad boys, only bad parents...


And, always, great work

Angel said...

It sounds like a dog in alot of ways, except for the matches and biting lip part. Good job!

narasnook said...

Thinking he might have good reason for his love of matches.

susan said...

You so damn wicked. Love it.

Dee Martin said...

It's probably a little easier to think of him as a dog. Wicked good, Thom. I almost wanted to hand him the matches in the end. The whole bunch is not someone you would want living in your cul de sac...

b said...

If he wasn't a bad 'boy' before, her certainly is now. Wow! Good read.

b

Thomma Lyn said...

*cackle*! I loved this. It speaks to me of overzealous parents who focus on rigid control instead of on love and guidance. No wonder the little fellow is getting closer and closer to cracking!

As always, a masterful job.

Zouxzoux said...

Few kids are bad from birth. I wonder what made this kid bad. Parents aren't automatically exempt from blame, IMO.
Awesome story.

Larry said...

Bul Jeeessss I think I had a son like you or was it a dog LOL.I'm posted too come looky lou and see whats up at my place.


Eternal Love


thanks Larry

Ann (bunnygirl) said...

I like the way you used dog obedience cues in this story. Whether the kid was bad from birth or not, the way he was handled will certainly lead to more trouble.

Amity said...

Hi Thom;

Am just new at 3WW...and thanks for the prodding of a good friend, I did the prompt for this week...:)

I read from Sue's place (Tumblewords) that you are hosting this place...and I am meeting great people like her and you and all the others...:)

Please check mine here at:

http://intelclub.blogspot.com/2010/03/beneath-veil.html

Your story here is quite interesting...nice pet training it is! But I hate pets, not a dog, not a cat or any other kinds.... :)

Thanks Thom for 3WW, this place will surely give a challenge to my neophyte skills in writing.

Have a nice day!

Tumblewords: said...

'who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men?' I think The Shadow said that, maybe. A drama that festers, for sure. Nice writing, as usual.

Irene said...

Good read. Love the shocker in the end.

one more believer said...

man, love stinks!!! ... now i will forever look at the animals in a whole different light... and that includes the one i sleep with..ya go figure... i never made him wear the shock collar...

Timothy P. Remp said...

Hey Thom,

‘scrath’ Oooh flame. :0)

I’d like to read from the Parents view point next time.

You always take your work to places I never expect.

Bravo!
-Tim

My 3ww:
http://timremp.blogspot.com/2010/03/misunderstood.html#comments

Americanising Desi said...

and the wickedness stays standing :)