The words over at Three Word Wednesday are harmless, moist, yelp. This bit of silliness is a re-write of a much smaller piece done a few years ago.
Dogcatcher
I awake with my face pressed up against wire mesh, completely wrecked, a splitting headache and dirty black hairs stuck to my moist, full lips.
I’m in a dog run, concrete floor, hurricane fence front. A water dish, upturned, and a food dish half-full of kibble in one corner. A ratty rug is bunched up in the opposite corner.
My stirring draws the attention of a rheumy-eyed Bassett hound next door.
“I say, could you please tell these good fellows that I am certainly not a stray,” he says. “I have a fine home. I just walked a wee bit too far a field. Here, good sir, take a look at these tags.”
His yelps get the young tawny-colored mutt in next run going.
“Dude, dude, hey dude,” he says. “It was a harmless little nibble, serious. I didn’t mean to bite her, really. But man, they taste good huh? I mean goooood. You’re hearin’ me huh? Goooood.”
I let out a hideous growl, low and throaty and both dogs, tails tucked, retreat to opposite corners. I walk back to the rug, un-bunch it, walk three times in a circle, curl up.
The sound of a single leather pump tapping on the concrete raises me from a fitful slumber. It’s my mother, standing with arms crossed, her mouth a stern line of red lipstick. She’s got a pair of jeans, a T-shirt and a pair of flip-flops in a plastic bag at her feet.
I stretch, try to hide my nakedness.
“Boy, am I glad to see you,” I say, shaking my wild mane of tangled hair.
“Oh don’t give me that,” she says, waging a finger at me. “Fifty-six years and your father’s never once been picked up by the dogcatcher. I’m so ashamed.”
28 comments:
You've given us more than a dog-tale..and I am trying to piece together the anomalies - the clothes in the bag, the 56 years...I feel exposed myself leaving the first comment..thank you for making me think...great write as ever..Jae
Hmm a cup of tea later and now I'm thinking maybe there's a bit of werewolf action here..
I enjoyed it. For somebody else it would be perfect. For you the writing is a bit too much, almost verging on the pretentious. Yet the story works and as I said for somebody else it would be amazing. But I love your writing because usually it's written down to the bone--not to make the worst pun in history
Ah, sometimes a groaner is what counts :-)
Enjoyed it.
Bad dog! Children, pets, they both bring heart ache. Nice little giggle.
You paint your scenes so well, and I'm with Jae, werewolf? brilliantly done, I loved it! :o)
It was fun reading it..and wow, the last line..brilliant.. Thank You..for the prompts ..I don't know where they took me..but I poured out.. and I am feeling nice.. good challenge, dear..
Just when I thought I 'got' it, I totally realized that I didn't! What a terrific read!
LOL! I also thought I "got" it, until the last line snagged me up. Inventive and sharp, and I guess we're all thinking about dogs today, eh?
A tale with agreat twist Love this Thom!
i got it. nice. you're alter animal ego sometimes takes over the pen. I think he is a far more light hearted fellow than yourself.
it hurts to laugh right now but I did :)
i had to read twice after you wrote of 56 years !! is it a human with disease to bite or a werewolf as others said ?
interesting !!
How funny!
I'm not the only guy who went strange today!
Oh I like that LOL
Love the play between human & canine. brilliant!
This reminds me in a weird way of a movie called "The Shaggy DA." It brought back fond memories :) Enjoyed!
Oh the shame! I love how this began and didn't see the ending coming at all. Now this is some great storytelling.
I really enjoy an good dog tail, especially on the full moon.
Fun stuff, as always!
I like the way you played games with my thought, I was sure I got you then you turned on me
I think this can be considered a real 'shaggy dog story'. Loved it; loved it.
Altonian
I guess it's not always like father-like son...or like hound-like pup.
I'm not sure I got this one. Is he human, dog, werewolf, or turns into a dog? The end made me think he was human, a dog really does not need to cover his nakedness. Would love to read more and figure it out.
I was worried about where this might be going so the twist was a relief. Kid needs to watch himself!
Hilarious!
That was great, I loved the ending!
Easy to get caught up in the story, but I fear I didn't get the ending. My fault I'm sure. Grandma's kind of a simple gal.
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